Bad Day
by onesongofglory
Summary: Good thing this bad day only rolls around once a year.


Today was always a bad day. No matter what the weather was like outside, I could never stand today. And no matter how much money I made, I hated today.

To be honest, it wasn't the actual day, but the date itself. And by the end of the day, I always found myself in the same spot. Every time over the past years, whether my brother joined me or not. But somehow, he always found his way to my side each year.

When I woke up this year it was dark and gloomy outside. It was as if nature knew exactly how I was feeling. I sighed, hearing Henderson's old but kind voice ringing throughout the bunkroom. Another morning, but not just any other day. At least to me.

I silently climbed out of my bunk, grabbing my pants and shoes, and rushed to the washroom. I didn't want to talk to anyone, at least for longer than I had too. I hurried through my morning routine, nodding my good mornings to a few girls that were awake. Finally, I made my way out of the lodging house, brushing past the boys on my way down the stairs.

I shoved my hands into my pockets, keeping my eyes downcast. My feet carried me on my usual route to the distribution center. The sky was overcast and dark, it was hard to tell it was even morning.

When I reached the center, I stood against a wall, my gaze still focused on the ground. I felt a figure creep up to my side and lean against the wall next to me. I didn't even look up at them to see who it was.

"Morning," the person mumbled. I recognized the voice as Dutchy's, the cute, blond haired German.

I didn't glance at him, but returned his greeting all the same. "Beautiful day, ain't it?" I asked sarcastically. I dug my toe into the ground, staring hard at my actions.

Dutchy let out a quiet chuckle. "Rough day already? That's a new record."

I finally looked at him, my eyebrows raised at him. "New record, huh? I beat Skitts'? Amazing." I let out a low whistle, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a cigarette and match. My eyes shifted around nervously before I lit it, staring off into the distance.

"Since when do you smoke?" I knew he was giving me a scrutinizing look. I was pretty sure he picked that up from my brother.

"Since it's a bad day." I blew out some smoke. "No one knows. So don't go telling anyone." I took another drag before sighing.

I could see Dutchy watching the smoke swirl out of my nostrils. He nodded silently, crossing his arms and staring up at the sky. "Rain."

I rolled my eyes. "Great." I took one last hit of the cigarette and threw it to the ground. 'Bring it on,' I thought as everyone trickled slowly to the center.

-----------------

By the time I normally went for lunch, the rain was pouring down hard. It hit my arms and head, causing a tiny twinge of pain to course through my body with each drop. The last few papers of mine were soaked and no one was outside to buy them.

I threw my papers down in frustration, silently cursing the rain. I yelled up at the sky, not daring to look up all the way. I feared the rain would drill into my eyes, causing me to go blind. Today of all days.

I started walking, but I wasn't paying attention to where my feet were leading me. At that point, I didn't care. However, I knew I had to warm up and dry off before I got sick. I sighed, knowing I was a bit of a walk from either lodging house.

I glanced around, for the first time since I started walking, and recognized the buildings that surrounded me. Oddly enough, that caused me to grin. Riot worked down the street.

I ran to the small café, hoping he was working. I knew he could cheer me up. He never let me down in that department. And even though we were a couple, no one knew that. So far, we managed to keep it a secret even with our few close calls.

I stopped once I was outside the little bistro. I peered inside, my hands cupped around my face, which was plastered to the window. It wasn't too busy, thank goodness. No one wanted to be out in the rain. I spotted Riot quickly and beamed. He didn't see me standing there, staring in like a drowned street rat stalker.

He was cleaning off a table, a few of his brown hairs sticking to his forehead from his sweat. Suddenly, he turned, as if his name was called. He smiled and exchanged a few words with someone. I made a face when I saw whom it was.

Corner was sitting at a table a few feet away from him. I sighed, knowing I couldn't go in there. I turned and leaned against the glass, shoving my hands in my pockets once again. I didn't need casual conversation with Riot today, at least I felt like I couldn't fake not being with him. I wanted comfort, not friendliness.

Corner was a sweet girl and I did like her. If I didn't, then it would have been difficult around the lodging house. But she was Riot's sister, one reason not to tell our secret. That and she was dating my brother. Riot and I decided it would be better not to tell them or anyone. We didn't want to create issues between us.

My auburn hair was dripping wet, weighing down my head slightly. I pushed my hair back, out of my face, the back of my head hitting the glass with a tiny thud. I didn't know what to do next, so I just stood there.

My thud must have caught some attention, because a moment later the door opened. I didn't bother to look to see who it was, but the commanding voice boomed at me anyhow. "Get off the window, kid." Instantly, I recognized the voice.

I pushed off the glass and faced the man. "Who you calling kid, kid?" I asked, placing my hands on my hips. "Shouldn't you be working?"

Riot grinned instantly, taking a step towards me. I stepped back, motioning inside discretely. He stopped and nodded solemnly. "You're soaking wet!" he exclaimed, after giving me the once over.

"Well, it is raining." I smirked at him. "That's what happens when you sell in the rain." I sighed, wrapping my arms around myself. "I just thought I would see if you were working. You are and you already have company. I was just about to leave," I explained.

Riot nodded. "Well, at least let me get you a cup of coffee to take with you or something. Warm you up a bit."

I shook my head. "No. It's okay. I don't like coffee anyway. I am going to go home anyway. I'll catch you later, okay?" I smiled and started off, not waiting for him to answer.

"Bye!" he called after me. I was pretty sure he was still standing there, watching me go.

I turned the corner, sighing. I didn't feel like walking in the rain anymore, but it had to be done. I decided once I got home that I would change my clothes and crawl into my bed and warm up. Sounded like a good plan to me.

-------------------------------

The rain kept falling. It was a monotonous sound, the continual dripping of the steady rain, and it was enough to drive any of them mad. With every raindrop that made contact with the ground, it was another newspaper that was not sold. Because, obviously, who would go out and sell in the rain?

I, myself, was content with the rain. The lodging house was full of activity, since no one wanted to go out and sell the afternoon edition. I was curled up in my bunk, facing the wall, listening to the rain hit the fire escape. The rain had let up a bit, but not much. I knew that I would end up out in the rain again.

I was so focused on the rain on the fire escape; I didn't hear anyone walk up to my bunk. I was so startled at the light tap on my shoulder, I nearly fell out of the top bunk. I sat up, facing the culprit, slightly annoyed. "What is it?" I asked, my eyes focusing on the face.

Rogue's blue eyes were wide as she stared at me. "Jumpy much?" She crawled up onto my bed with me, pushing me over gently. "What's the matter with you? You seem kinda, well, not yourself today. It worries me," she asked softly.

I shook my head. "Nothing. Honest. Just kind of tired. Must be the weather. Rain and gray skies make me like this every so often. Not a big deal. Promise," I rambled, only half lying. It wasn't like I was going to spill why I was so upset today. I didn't want anyone feeling sorry for me. I hated that.

Rogue raised an eyebrow at my answer, crossing her arms. "I'm so sure. You are a horrible liar. Has anyone ever told you that?" She sighed, shaking her head. "I won't press the matter, because obviously you don't want to talk. But if you want to, I'm here." She leaned against the wall, glancing at the other end of the room, where Locket and Periwinkle were giggling at some new gossip.

I nodded slowly. "I know. Thanks." I offered a small, appreciative smile. "So, what's new with my Rogue?"

She shrugged. "Nothing really. Just enjoying a wonderful day of rain," she replied sarcastically, a silly grin on her face.

"Sounds like everyone else in this house. Although, I think Glory is not so happy about the amazing weather we are graced with today," I joked, referring to the other leader of the house and my lower bunkmate.

Rogue laughed at my comment. "That girl hasn't been in a good mood if she has to deal with Skittery. I don't see why she's so attracted to him."

"I do. He can be a great guy when he's in a good mood. He actually makes jokes." I nodded seriously. "Specs told me so." I giggled. It was nice to be happy at least once today.

"Ah, I see. Well, in that case." She sighed. "At least Mush is always in a good mood."

"Yeah, well I wouldn't want to see him mad. It's always the nice, quiet ones you have to watch out for," I pointed out. I eyed her suspiciously, before scooting over a couple more inches. "Which means, you are a ticking time bomb," I teased.

She rolled her eyes, pushing me with her elbow. "Oh hush. Why are so mean to me?" She stuck her lower lip out in a fake pout.

Now it was my turn to roll my eyes. "Only because I love you."

"Good enough," she replied, shrugging. She broke out into a grin once more before sliding off my bunk. "Well, then, I will take my leave now. Till we meet again, dear girl." She sauntered off, her hair swinging behind her.

I sighed, lying back down again. I stared up at the ceiling, my eyes following a crack above my bed. After a couple of minutes of fighting with myself, I finally descended off my bunk and headed to the door. I knew exactly where I was going, my feet taking me down the stairs and out the front door.

The rain had let up to a light mist as I was conversing with Rogue inside. I lifted my face to the sky, pausing, letting the mist caress my face lightly. It felt good, almost refreshing. I started my journey again, shuffling my feet as I walked. There were no other sounds in the streets, so I was left alone with my thoughts, which were blaring loudly in my head.

I headed towards the Brooklyn Bridge, wishing I had a cigarette. I scowled to myself. Just another secret I hid from everyone, even Riot and my brother. My secrets were only revealed to those I chose to know them. And even then, it was a very select few.

As I started crossing the bridge, my thoughts drifted to my past. I sighed and scowled again. It was not one of my favorite topics, and I often didn't dwell on it, but this day every year it was the main thing on my mind. Sometimes I thought I was happier then, but I knew it wasn't true.

Back then I had to deal with my mother. It wasn't like she beat my or my brother at all. It was more her attitude towards us that I hated. It seemed like she came across as jealous of her own kids when my father paid attention to us. Of course, at that time, I didn't recognize it for what it was. But now I was older and wiser, so I knew. Maybe that's what compelled her to do what she did.

About ten minutes later, I stepped off the bridge and glanced around. I stared off in the direction I was about to head, taking a deep breath. My heart starting beating madly and my head was pounding. For some reason, I always got nervous at this point. I never understood that.

As my feet deftly carried me off to my destination, I shoved my hands in my pockets. My fingers ran across a small group of stones. I held back a laugh at the memory of how they got there. I completely forgot to put them in a bag. Riot had given the stones to me as a joke, but I secretly decided to treasure them. I wasn't going to tell him, for the fear of him thinking me weird. I just learned to hang on to everything thing that I received from those I care about, whether it was physical or not.

A twig snapped beneath my feet as I crossed into the solemn grounds of the graveyard. My eyes flitted over the tombstones, my face stony as I read the newest ones. It seemed like there were quite a few since I had been there last. I cleared my throat, the sound echoing across the graveyard and bouncing off the stones.

I started for the back of the grounds, to my annual spot of the night. I kept my head down, staring at the dead grass and twigs that littered the graves of the dead. I didn't want to be here, but no matter what I did, I ended up here. I finally looked up, spotting the most familiar gravestone.

I slowed my pace as I came up to it. I studied it closely, making sure there wasn't any damage done to it since the last time I saw it. As soon as I was satisfied with what I saw, I sighed. I didn't know what to say. I thought I would have plenty to say to him this year, but when I got there and stared at his headstone, I lost all words. I took a deep breath and decided I should tell him about the lodging house and Riot.

Once I started, the words spilled from my mouth like the rain fell from the sky earlier. I couldn't stop. Everything about how I was feeling, which people I was seeing, and how much I have sold over the past year just kept coming out. I told him about how I started smoking, knowing he wouldn't approve. I told him about the pranks I have played with Mischief, explaining in great detail the infamous Delancey Escapade. I could hear his laughter as he pictured that one.

I stopped. There was really laughter behind me. My blood ran cold and my eyes grew wide. I slowly turned around, half expecting to see him standing there. Once I realized who it was, I let out a sigh of relief. "You scared me! I thought he was behind me!" I burst out.

Specs furrowed his brow, mumbling his apology. He took a couple more steps to me. "Didn't mean to scare you," he said quietly.

I shrugged. "It's okay. It was crazy of me to think that it was him. I mean, he has been dead for a while. You just have the same laugh as he does." I smiled. "I don't mind it. It's nice to have a reminder of him around."

Specs smiled back. "Thanks. I guess." He glanced at the crude tombstone, before looking back at me. "So, you've started smoking, huh?"

I blushed, knowing I had been caught. I hoped to God he hadn't heard me talk about Riot and I. "Yeah, well, only when I'm upset or thinking. Which isn't often at all. I did have one this morning. Courtesy of Dutchy, of course. I went into his pocket after it."

He tossed me a disapproving look. "I'll have to keep a better eye on you then."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Oh, please. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself, y'know," I pointed out.

Specs nodded, patting my shoulder. "I know. I know. I can't believe it's been ten years already." He let out a huge sigh, going back to staring at the headstone.

"I'm glad the people who he worked with all chipped in to help pay for everything. Without them, he would have just had a wooden cross with only his name. And with, her disappearing and all, we never would have been able to take care of it all." At least there were still decent people around.

Specs nodded. "Got that right." He paused, draping an arm around my shoulders and pulling me to him. "You all right?" he asked.

I nodded. "As good as I could be. I mean, I have food, shelter and friends. What more could I ask for?" I glanced at him, my eyes peering into his.

He shrugged. "Him?" He gestured to the crude stone marker.

I shook my head. "No. I don't need him anymore," I snapped. The very thought of it made me angry for some reason. "I have you, don't I? You're better than that. You won't leave me like he did."

Specs turned me to face him, his eyes roaming over my face. He studied me for a minute, almost looking angry. "You listen to me. He loved you and you know it. He wouldn't have left you, or me, if he had that choice. So, don't you dare say that he left you. He was taken from us." He shook me as he said his last statement.

Tears welled up in my eyes. "I'm sorry," I sniffled. I clung to him, burying my face into his chest. "It's been about ten years and I still miss him. It's not fair."

He stroked my hair. He knew how much I missed him. He knew I was close to him. It was the only reason I had the nickname I did. Because he gave it to me. "I know you miss him. It's okay to miss him," he whispered. "The fact that you still remember him keeps him alive in you."

I sniffed. My brother, the ever philosopher. He was right though. At least I could remember him, unlike many other children that didn't have that opportunity. I didn't move, although my tears subsided. "Thanks. For everything," I murmured into him.

He kissed the top of my head. "It's what I'm here for. Being your big brother and all." He held me out at arm's length, smiling. "Come on. Let's get you home."

I nodded. "Okay." As he started off, I took one last look at the tombstone. "Till next year, daddy," I whispered, before taking off after Specs.

_Jonathon Anderson_

_Loving father and friend_

_Died March 27, 1888_


End file.
